Looking Forward, Looking Back

“There is no reason to dwell on regrets because when you made those decisions, they were the choices that you thought were best at the time.”

~ Jerry Chen (Happy birthday, Dad!)

And really, that’s all anyone can ask of us. Talk about words that I live by—ever since my dad said them to me during a particularly stressful week more than five summers ago. The words above are a rough translation from Chinese, but I’ve done my best to stay true to the idea.

It can be so easy to get caught up in our mistakes, or to get stuck because we’re not entirely sure what the right choice is and we’re afraid that the outcome won’t be what we expect or want. Should I have applied to that internship? Should I have gone to that party? Should I have said this during my interview? Should I have chosen a different major? Life is always full of so many choices and so many “what if”s. So maybe you decide to do something and then you learn that it wasn’t such a good idea, that maybe things weren’t exactly what you thought they were. That’s just part of living. We can’t see into the future, but we can make sure that we consider our options carefully when we are presented with them and make the best decision that we can at that moment. What happens after that is out of our control and shouldn’t be allowed to frustrate us.

It’s hard not to feel disappointed when things don’t work out and that’s okay, but it’s a choice I make not to let it bother me for too long. It’s about how to move forward, because no matter how much time we devote to wishing it, we can never go back.