The Paths We Walk

“I think you can go crazy if you try to find reasons for everything.”

~ Dunk by David Lubar

Because a lot of things in life just happen. And whether or not you believe there are greater plans at work, we’re just not capable of seeing and understanding it all.

I first read the book Dunk back in college. It was part of the huge bag of audiobooks my twin and I borrowed every couple weeks from the library and stashed in our dorm room for when we needed to alleviate boredom. Somehow, the story stuck in my memory, and I re-borrowed it a couple weeks ago. Like many other young adult books, it touched on issues of fitting in, figuring out who you are, and growing up. But unlike the majority of these books, its protagonist’s dream job was to be a Bozo. He wanted to be the clown who sits in a cage on the boardwalk shouting insults at passersby, trying to rile them up so they’ll pay money for the chance to dunk him. In an interview with the author, he talked about seeing this attraction at a boardwalk amusement park and thinking—wow, what a great way for a kid to vent some of his frustrations. After all, it’s not every day that you get the chance to just scream at the world without being punished or seriously hurting people.

Sure, there are many good things in life, but there are also so many tragedies—the Malaysia passenger plane shot down and the pipe explosion in Kaohsiung yesterday just to name a few recent ones. The streets there look like a warzone in the aftermath of the explosion with the smoke and the flames, the ruined buildings and the roads that have completely caved in. Hundreds of people have been hospitalized, and last we saw on the news, the body count was still rising. It’s painful to even think about. There are so many things that lie outside of our control, and the only thing we can be sure of is that nothing is for sure.

That, and that things change.

Meeting up with old friends also tends to bring such thoughts to mind, especially old friends I’ve known since before college. Everyone has walked such different paths, and the only thing we all have in common is that our paths have not taken us where we originally planned to be. There’s not much point in wondering why or trying to figure out if that’s good or bad.

Something Funny #2

“People used to say my face was perfect for radio”

~ James from Team Rocket, Pokemon episode 160 “Air Time”

I love this kind of subtle humor.

And so the insult goes unnoticed by poor James who doesn’t realize you can’t see faces over the radio.

The old Pokemon episodes were so much better than the new ones. For one thing, Team Rocket actually said funny things and wasn’t always about giant robots.

Happiness Is

“Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.”

~ Albert Schweitzer 

I’d say that happiness was a little more than that, but this quote still rings with a kind of truth to me. Keep yourself healthy and forget the things that upset you, and being happy becomes much easier.

Perhaps there’s always something a little sad about remembering, despite how important it can be not to forget.

I was listening to my Chinese music collection today, and although I love many of the songs, nearly all of them left a bittersweet aftertaste. My dad once told me that so much of traditional Chinese music and many older Chinese songs are sad because the history of the Chinese people has been full of suffering. Of course, many people from cultures all over the world have gone through their fair—and unfair—share of hardships, but I suppose you really rack up the numbers when your history is as long as that of China.

In comparison, American history takes almost no time at all. It was one of my cousin’s favorite topics in history class because it only took them one day to cover it in Taiwan.

It’s ironic that it’s all these trials both in history and in our own lives that provide us with the material we need to write good stories.

Pacing

“If one shoulders the weight of the world, all one will accomplish is to be crushed under the world’s weight”

~ Master Splinter, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Season 2 Episode 14

I took this comic book class in college for fun, and one of the teachers was talking about not overdoing it on the dialogue. He drew this wonderful picture of Batman being crushed under the weight of his own word bubbles, which I will always remember.

I guess it’s a reminder to pace yourself and not bite off more than you can chew.

The Words of the Wise

“I am an old person and that means what I say is wisdom”

~ Wintersmith by Terry Pratchett 

A sentiment which often seems shared by elderly people everywhere—or at least definitely by my own grandmother. When I was little, it used to irritate me more than a little bit. But now that I’m older, I think she had many good points. I may not agree with everything she says, but perhaps there are certain lessons that we all have to learn as we grow up.

As Mom observed, some pieces of advice are the same from nearly all old people. She heard them from her grandmother and now I hear them from mine.

One of these pieces of advice was not to get too caught up in or bothered by the little things in life. In the long run, you find that many things you get angry or upset over now really aren’t as important as you thought.

My own grandmother likes to say that when bad things happen, there’s no need to get too unhappy—and when good things happen, there’s no need to get too excited. And that’s because all things will pass. Nothing stays bad or good forever. Things change, people change. Life goes on.

To a happy and interesting New Year...

Making Happiness

“Happiness is not the natural state of mankind and is never achieved from the outside in.”

~ Witches Abroad by Terry Pratchett

I was talking with Mom on the car the other night about happiness and what people need—or don’t need—in order to be happy. Long drives after dark along streets lined with streetlights seem to be good times for such philosophical discussions. But in any case, I brought up this quote and spent some time explaining to her what it meant.

Happiness is something that we have to work for. If we want it to last, it has to come from inside. No amount of money or fame or popularity will make a person happy if he (or she) doesn’t believe that he is happy.

You can’t give someone else happiness—although of course, you can help.

I was always fascinated by the fact that happiness is literally good for you. It’s healthy to be happy, and in light of this, my psychology textbook in college suggested taking a few minutes out of every day to list all the things you are thankful for—even the little things like “I’m thankful that it was sunny” or “that was a great cup of coffee”. So maybe I feel a little silly sometimes doing this, but I find that it really does work, especially when I’m feeling stressed or frustrated. Perhaps this practice also helps to keep us grounded in the present, to pull us back from getting too caught up in useless anxieties about what lies ahead and just be grateful that we made it through another day.

In addition, if other people can’t give you happiness, it also means that they can’t take it away from you.

Jigsaw

“Art is making some order out of chaos—out of randomness”

~ Laurie A. Doyle, Craft of Writing class Fall 2013

I never really thought about art that way, but it does make a kind of sense.

Perhaps this is one reason we write, one reason we do art and compose music—in an attempt to make order out of the chaos of our lives and get some semblance of sense out of it all. It would also explain why, for the most part, we don’t like stories to be full of inconsistencies and illogical contradictions. We don’t want our stories to so much mirror life as explain it.

Another student in my class asked the professor, “How can I make sure my writing has a deeper meaning?” She felt that her work read too simply, not like those literary pieces we discuss in class brimming with layers upon layers of “deeper meanings” and philosophies that people can talk about for hours. As a writer who has sometimes felt the same, I really liked the professor’s answer.

As long as you’re writing about life, she said, your work can’t be too simple. After all, being a human being is extremely complicated. I find this helpful to keep in mind, although I use the phrase “human being” loosely.

I often feel like the process of developing and writing a story is like sorting through a puzzle. I love the moment when each piece starts to click into place, when problems I didn’t yet have the solutions to begin to resolve themselves. There’s just something beautiful about discovering how all those pieces come together to form the final masterpiece.

The "Right" Way

“I ask them to take a poem
and hold it up to the light
like a color slide

or press an ear against its hive.

I say drop a mouse into a poem
and watch him probe his way out,

or walk inside the poem's room
and feel the walls for a light switch.

I want them to waterski
across the surface of a poem
waving at the author's name on the shore.

But all they want to do
is tie the poem to a chair with rope
and torture a confession out of it.

They begin beating it with a hose
to find out what it really means.”

~ Billy Collins, “Introduction to Poetry” from The Apple that Astonished Paris

I started attending a creative writing class last week, and this was one of the pieces we read on the first day. I guess it’s not exactly a quote, but it’s short and I laughed aloud when I read it—so here it is.

Aside from having some rather fun imagery, the last few lines really reminded me of the relationship between so many students and their—often forced—study of literature. They’re asked to write essays about what they read, and so often, it seems like they just want to know what they’re “supposed to write” and what the “right” answer is. I need to remind them constantly that when it comes to interpreting something and writing an essay about it, there’s no such thing as a right answer. Every scene, every line of text, every picture—it can all strike us in different ways and probably does all the time. There’s only whether you explain your thoughts clearly enough, and how well you back up your ideas with reasons that other people can understand.

Understanding is a dynamic process. It changes and evolves as observations are made or connections are drawn. That’s what makes examining a piece of artwork interesting; everyone can look at a piece in a different way, and they can all be right.

Remembering

“The important thing about having lots of things to remember is that you’ve got to go somewhere afterwards where you can remember them, you see? You’ve got to stop. You haven’t really been anywhere until you’ve got back home.” 

~ Twoflower, The Light Fantastic by Terry Pratchett

Not one of my favorite Discworld books, but I always did like this quote.

Finally coming back home after spending three months in Taiwan feels so surreal. All of life’s usual routines slip back into place with barely a whisper, and it’s as though I’ve never left except for the memories and all the little things that I brought back.

Maybe it’s a bit ridiculous too, but sometimes, it really does feel like you haven’t been anywhere until you tell someone about it. In the telling, our words somehow give the memories substance. While the adventure is happening, you’re often too busy taking part in it to really register the experience.

To all those who celebrate it, a happy Chinese Mid-Autumn Festival!

Growing Up

“If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there”

~ George Harrison 

An interesting thought, although I guess it depends on what you mean by not knowing where you are going. Obviously, when it comes to life, you can’t know for sure. But a lot of us have dreams of where we want to go.

If I interpret this quote to mean that there is no “right” road, then I think it makes a lot of sense.

Two of my cousins have recently graduated from college, and it’s been two years since I started on the same road that they are now embarking on. That and the heavy rains going on outside right now make me think a lot about how things have changed. In a lot of ways, going to college and graduating from it marks a point in our lives where we’re considered grown up: adults. It’s when we really start having to not only make our own decisions but take the responsibilities that come with them and the consequences that follow. It’s when we really have to start making our own plans for the future.

And it seems to me that the biggest difference between being a child and being an adult is that you discover that no one can give you the “right” answers to anything. A lot of people will have answers when it comes to what you should do or what you should try, but accepting those answers is a matter of choice—and no matter what you choose, it’s not “right” or “wrong”. No one can tell you if it’s good or bad that you decide to take one job or another, if you decide to go to graduate school, or if you want to take a year off to go exploring the world before settling down. The fact is that other people don’t know any more about how a decision will affect your future in the long run than you do. A little annoying and inconvenient sometimes when you want advice, but true.

So in the end, we just have to keep moving forward. Keep learning, keep doing things, and keep trying to find a way to reach our goals. As long as we don’t sit idle, we’ll get to where we need to be.

The Importance of Learning Language

“Nobody is capable of free speech unless he knows how to use language, and such knowledge is not a gift: it has to be learned and worked at.”

~ Northrop Frye, The Educated Imagination

I’ve just finished teaching in a rather intensive summer program, and this quote seems to me like a great reminder for all of my English students. We spent much of the last six weeks discussing—and, of course, writing—about language and communications. I chose this topic both because it had the potential for good debates and also because it was relevant to my students’ own lives and their experiences learning English in a Chinese-speaking country. While looking for arguments against the learning of a foreign language, one group of students decided to go with the fact that it would take away from or interfere with learning one’s native tongue. It was a logical choice, but they had the hardest time elaborating upon it. Perhaps it’s too easy to take for granted the advantages of being able to use one’s native language.

Why learn a language? Why bother working so hard to master the nuances of written and spoken communications?

Well, for one thing, because in order to really express yourself, it’s kind of important to be understood. Of course you don’t always have to use words. You can use pictures, music, videos—whatever artistic pursuit catches your fancy. But you can’t escape the fact that language makes up such a huge part of how people communicate. That’s why students come to class to try and learn how to use language—not just to be clear and to make sense, but also to be able to put their thoughts and feelings into their words. I’m sure my students would agree that it’s not that easy.

To Conform or Not to Conform

“Mom told me not to show off my real power, and I’m really trying not to. But why should I hide it? This whole fitting in thing is really weird.”

~ Son Gohan, Dragon Ball Z episode “Gohan Goes to High School”

Ah, weird doesn't even begin to cover it.

I’ve never felt more keenly than at this year’s BayCon how much of a monster social media has become. The one reoccurring piece of advice that all the panelists gave to writers at every panel I attended was to work at creating and maintaining a presence on the Web. It’s what you have to do in order to fit in to this changing society of ours, especially if you want to succeed. Apparently, there are some publishers who will not consider an author if he or she does not already have a sizeable e-network; they will actually look up authors on sites like Facebook to see how many “friends” they have.

It’s all rather ironic and a little sad. Strange too, considering how casually many social connections are made and treated. There was an article in the TIMES recently describing the “Me, Me, Me Generation” in which the author discusses how people in this modern era spend so much time and effort working to become noticed, to elaborate on their lives and become giants in the universe created by online social media. Maybe this is a little self-centered, but at the same time, it seems people have no choice. Even people who dislike or feel burdened by the constant demands of using social media have no choice but to join the fray, especially as a creative artist of any kind.

Because the fact is that, with how things are right now, that’s what works.

Yes, technology has made our lives easier in many ways. It has provided many people with new and amazing opportunities. But at the same time, it also makes life increasingly complicated.

So maybe we aren’t Saiyans and we don’t have superpowers that need to be kept secret, but fitting in is still a problem. Do we all really have to conform this way in order to get ahead? I guess there’s always an exception to the rule, but who knows?

Building Bridges

“Sitting down face to face and talking about things might not solve everything, but if we don’t do it, we’ll never understand each other at all.”

~ Matsumoto Rangiku, Bleach episode 63 (English version, of course) 

I was looking down the panel descriptions for this year’s BayCon and saw a panel on interpersonal communication skills. Everyone is encouraged to attend, it said, because such skills are great to have.

So true.

I know we’ve written about how important it is to listen, but for those who are shy or quiet or afraid, it’s perhaps also a good reminder that talking is important too. It’s hard to build solid friendships with people who don’t know anything about you, just as it’s hard for people to befriend you if you never share anything about yourself.

A good conversation has to involve more than one person, and that goes for both the talking and the listening. And good conversation skills go a long way in both deepening relationships and solving problems.

Last week, my family decided to give everyone some time during dinner where he or she could just talk and pour out everything that he or she has been thinking or worrying about. Only after said person had gotten everything out was anyone allowed to comment, advise, or give suggestions. I think it was a great idea. Banning interruptions also helped us avoid any possible arguments that arise from not fully understanding one person’s thoughts or problems. Hopefully, this is something we’ll continue to do.

Measuring the Moments

“IF PEOPLE KNEW WHEN THEY WERE GOING TO DIE, I THINK THEY PROBABLY WOULDN'T LIVE AT ALL.”

~ Death, Reaper Man by Terry Pratchett

There are so many ways you can think about this. At first glance, it seems to contradict the idea of “living for today”, but really, I think it’s the same idea from a different angle.

In Pratchett’s Reaper Man, Death—a being unused to the constraints of time—is faced with the knowledge that, as a living being, he will one day die. For him, this is a fact that inspires great fear, fear so oppressive that it disrupts necessary, everyday activities like sleep. I’m sure that many of us experience such fears and uncertainties at some point in our lives—What will happen to me? What about the people that I love?—and they most certainly make it hard to concentrate on living. If people knew when they were going to die, I wonder who would be consumed by despair and who would actually be able to take advantage of the time they have. To know and feel the deadline drawing ever closer—it would certainly be an unpleasant piece of knowledge to be burdened with.

On the other hand, sometimes, the knowledge that we must all one day move on can inspire people to live their lives more fully. It can be the push that people need to go ahead and take a risk or to try something new, knowing that we may not have a second chance. It can be a bit morbid, but I think it works.

And perhaps the knowledge of the ephemeral nature of our own lives can help us put things in perspective—help rearrange our priorities.

As I write these things, this is a song that comes to mind.

Men and Monsters

“Bradley understands love. He’s going to make it just fine as a human being, and the only things I personally choose to exterminate are demons.”

~ Dante, Devil May Cry episode 3 

With how much time people spend wondering about who they are and what their purpose really is in the grand scheme of things, perhaps it’s to be expected that so many stories concern themselves with the question of what it really means to be a human being. Or, as it may turn out, what it means not to be a human being—whether or not you really have to have supernatural powers or come from another dimension to be a demon.

As a fantasy writer, I also have a certain fascination with the philosophical details of these questions.

It’s interesting how often emotions of caring or love are associated with a person’s humanity. I have to admit that such an association appeals to me, but I wonder if perhaps this has more to do with what we want to believe than what is actually true. Likewise, we call the people who do terrible and evil things monsters because we don’t want to believe that a human being—a being like ourselves—would ever commit such cruelties.

of course, that’s the rather pessimistic view of things.